a rant

I'm in a reclusive mood today. I don't want to talk with anyone...I just need to be in my own little world. Omar went to Trujillo for the weekend to visit his parents and some friends, and I opted to stay here with Celeste. It's a good thing, too, because I need the weekend to myself. Have you ever been in one of those moods where you just want to shut out the world? That's where I am right now. This morning, two of Omar's friends came to the house...at about 4:30 this morning...drunk, and he let them in. They left not too long after they came, but while they were here, they dropped their cigarette ashes on the rug, slopped beer on the floor, and somebody peed himself on the sofa (It's beyond me how an adult could do such a thing, but drunks are drunks.) Actually, showing up drunk at someone's house is completely disrespectful, as far as I'm concerned. It shows no respect for oneself and no respect for the person you are visiting. I was furious with all of them - furious with the buddies for coming to my house, drunk, at such an hour and furious at Omar for allowing them to come in.

I showed Omar the sofa, and all he could do was to stand there with his mouth open. Then we had a serious talk about how people are to behave while in this apartment. The house smells like a pigsty, although it looks tidy enough NOW. I have some laundry to do in order to make things better, now that I've scrubbed the sofa and rinsed it with clorox water. I think the smell has been mostly removed. I still need to go over it again with some lavender soap to make it nice again. This has been the only time that I've been glad we don't have a regular fabric covered sofa. I have spots on the rug to take out. I'm just glad we have hardwood floors instead of wall to wall carpeting. What a nightmare that would be.

My apartment is my sanctuary, or at least I thought it was. It is not the local flop house for drunks to come to sleep it off, not the neighborhood gossip pond, not a party house. It's where I go to be safe, to relax, to be myself without the rest of the world invading.

So I'm cranky and still more than a little angry today, and do not want to talk with anyone. Omar called me a couple of times this morning, but you know what? I just don't feel like answering. It's not my day to be nice. I need some time to myself. He can go to Trujillo and see the rest of the world. I can't. I don't want to. I need tme to pout and get over things.